SasoDei Hotel
by AkatsukiMemberWoolfy
Summary: The plot begins with Deidara's confession. After a talk with an old friend Sasori is persuaded to take Deidara to a festivle for a few days. Tobi is bought into the picture, causing Deidara to forget Everything! Unfortunately, also including Sasori.
1. SasoDei Hotel

Sasori and Deidara were walking back to the base after their mission to get donuts (What can I say? I like donuts!!) for the rest of the Akatsuki. Since it wasn't really a mission they hadn't worn their Akatsuki cloaks. Deidara had on a black top that said 'Prima Donna' while Sasori wore a red hoody with an S on it.

"Danna?" Sasori had his mouth full with a plain donut but managed a small grunt noise. They had reached the base entrance and Deidara had stopped.  
"I think I love you." Sasori stared at the blonde, the donut falling out of his mouth in shock (lolz, cant you just imagine that XD). Deidara walked into the base and disappeared from Sasori's view. Sasori looked at the donut on the floor and being lazy, kicked it into the bushes where there was some rustling.

"DONUT!!!!" In the bushes a happy Tobi jumped out holding the donut which had a bite in it.

"…Tobi? How do you know where the base is?"

"Zetsu-san showed me, cause Tobi is a good boy!!"

"…Yes." Sasori blinked and walked in the base, leaving the immature Tobi to eat the probably dirty donut. Sasori was thinking about what the blonde had said before. He didn't know what to say when he next saw him. He needed advice. He walked into the kitchen where both Pein and Konan were seated. He put the box of donuts on the table and was about to walk out the room when Pein spoke up.

"Sasori, tomorrow is your mission with Deidara to retrieve the one tailed beast from the sand. Don't forget." Sasori nodded in remembrance and walked out the room and out of the base.

--------------------------

Deidara sat in his room. Why had he told his Danna, whom he idolized, how he truly felt?  
"You're an idiot Deidara, now tomorrow Sasori won't want to talk to me. Why would someone so irresistible share the same feelings for you, un?"

------------------------

Sasori sat at the top of a cliff he usually hung out on.

"I still don't see what's the problem, Sassy. He likes you, you like him, why do you have to be so awkward about it? Honestly, if this were a fan fiction (Lolz) you two would be getting up to some pretty bad smut at this moment." Sasori looked over at the girl lying on the grass. She was his friend and had been one of his previous partners though not for long. Her name was Karis, oh wait, no it was Woolfy. He often forgot she had changed her name, as she had changed her identity.

"Well, I'm sorry but this isn't a fan fiction (LIE!!), and all I have left to say to the rest of that sentence is that you need to get your head out the gutter." He stared at the sun set. He loved them because he believed them to be eternal, forever sinking and rising not long after. Art was truly eternal.

"True." Woolfy sat up with a sigh, moving her blonde fringe out her face. "But I won't make any promises. I'm going to continue telling you to do what's right. If I were a Catholic, I would be telling you something like 'You can't love him, he is a guy. It's against the bible.' But since I'm a Jashinist, I'm going to tell you something else. Tomorrow you two should go to some romantic place and that night you should fuck him hard." She gave him an immature smile as the puppet stared at her.

"…I knew you were too young to read that book when you were only nine. And being around grown ups back then was a bad idea, you sound just like your boy friend." A blush broke out over the blonde girl's face.

"Hidan isn't my boyfriend!!"

"I know, you just wish he was." Woolfy puffed out her cheeks, not wanting to admit that what the puppet said was true.

"Well, I'm 19 now that were 10 years ago. And it's your fault for always swearing around me when I was little. Anyway, as I said. You two need to go to a romantic hotel or something."

"Where you assume I'm going to take advantage of him?"

"Sounds bout right." Woolfy started rummaging in her pockets for something, finally pulling out a key with a blue jewel on it.  
"I have a permanent room at the Sapphire Hotel (For anyone who has read my Reviving Hidan Fan Fic, it is the same hotel ^-^). You can take Blondie there tomorrow." She threw the key to the puppet that caught and looked at it.

"I cant tomorrow, I have to do a mission."

"I can always fill in for you and Blondie, this is well more important than that."

"How can you fill in?"

"Well, I kinda look like DeiDei anyway, but I could spell a transformation jutsu…Un." Woolfy smiled at Sasori.

"Well, that's Deidara taken care of, but what about me?"

"Sassy, I had to put up 4 years of your puppetry. And seriously, nothing is more traumatizing to a little kid than dolls that kill people (Seriously!! Scarred for life!!). If I was normal, I would be scared shit of you. But I'm not normal, so getting back to topic; I know how to control a puppet. I could always control that puppet double of you." Sasori nodded then realized something.

"How did you know I had a puppet double of me?"

"Please, I know everything, also that you have a puppet of DeiDei under your bed." She gave an evil smile at the blushing red haired.  
"Anyway, you can trust me!!" Sasori returned his look to the key in hand.

"I trust you Danna. Fine, I will go tell Deidara to pack." He got up as soon as the sun had set and nodded at the girl, who had waved. He disappeared in a puff of smoke back to the base. Woolfy sighed.

"Well, I got a big day ahead of me…"

------------

There was a knock at the door. Deidara opened it to find his Danna standing there.


	2. Madara's Manipulation

Deidara opened the door to find his Danna standing before him. He gulped, not knowing whether he was going to get a slap or a kiss. If this was like all the fan fictions he read (Yes, he reads all ya fan fics bout him!!) then it was probably the second one. He could imagine the scene that was to come.

--- Deidara's (somewhat disturbing) imagination ^O^

"Deidara, I have always loved you. Thank you for telling me, now we can live happily ever after."

"Oh, Danna." Then he was swept up Bridal style and sat upon a white horse as they rode off into the sun set with the song Love Story by Tailor Swift in the back ground (Cute Song ^O^).

----Out of DeiDei's Fantasy (it not our fantasy!! WE WANT YAOI SMUT!!!)

Deidara was bought back to reality by a slap across his face (poor Deidei XD).

"What was that for, un!?"

"You weren't listening to me."

"Umm, Danna, if it's about what I said earlier-"

"You said something earlier? Sorry, mustn't have been listening (LIER!!). Anyway, Brat, as I was saying. Tomorrow one of my friends is going to be filling in for us. She has also sent us both on a little holiday for this festival tomorrow. Pack a bag of essentials (WooT I is smart ^o^) and we will leave at 5am." He walked off before Deidara could reply. She? That only meant he had been talking to Woolfy, one of his Danna's previous partners. She was also 19 and he was some what jealous of her. Sasori always talked to her, he even called her Danna, while he only called Deidara either by his name or 'Brat'.

--

Sasori was packing a bit when Deidara walked into his room.

"Sup Sassy?"

"…Woolfy?"

"Yeah…Un. See, I can do a good imitation (Omj I a genius XD) of DeiDei!!"

"…So I see…"

"How do I look?"

"…You don't wanna know what I think."

"I will accept the answer 'Like DeiDei'."

"Fine, like Deidara."

"INCORRECT!!!"

"…DeiDei…"

"Ding ding ding, we have ourselves a winner!!"

"…Anyway, I've gotten my spare body all set up, you can take Huroko (I know its spelt wrong, I'm too lazy =.=)." Woolfy nodded and held one hand in the air.

"Puppeteer Jutsu: Living Puppet." The Sasori double puppet that lay in the corner moved. It stood up of its own accord and walked over to the two. Sasori took off his cloak and handed it to the puppet of him, who put it on.

"So you have even mastered this Jutsu."

"Yes, Sassy, I have. This puppet will think itself you. Who are you, puppet?"

"I am Sasori. I believe Art is Eternal. You are my partner." It pointed at Woolfy who still looked like Deidara.

"Yes, un. I am Deidara, your partner. Now get in Hiroku and get along un."

"Brat, don't order me around. Now let's go, I don't like keeping people waiting."

Woolfy turned back to the real Sasori.

"I'm seeing double. We will leave now. Have fun." The Sasori Double was inside of Hiroku and outside the door.  
"Wait up Danna." She ran after the puppet double, ready for the mission to capture Shikoku.

The real Sasori closed his door behind them and finished packing his bag. That girl was crazy.

--

Deidara had packed his bags as soon as his Danna had left. He was now reading an Icha Icha novel. Is that why Sasori Danna is taking me to the festival? Maybe he will say he loves me!! I hope he does!! Deidara drooled over the book. Yeah, I want what's in this book to happen to me!! There was a knock at the door and Deidara jumped.

"Oh, that must be Sasori Danna, un." He smiled, stood up and walked to the door. Instead of finding the one he loved, there stood the masked face of Tobi.

"Hey Sempai!! Tobi is a good boy!!"

"What are you doing here Tobi?" Deidara blinked at the mask face, a bit irritated that it hadn't been his Danna who had been at the door.

"Tobi is here because Tobi knows. Tobi knows you are going on a date with Sasori-san. Tobi knows that you like Sasori-San. Tobi knows that Tobi wants you, and Tobi knows that Tobi won't let Sasori have you." The next thing Deidara knew, he was pinned to his own bed (TOBI IS EVIL!! *runs around in circles screaming*), his lips locked with Tobi's, his mask partly off. Deidara tried to push Tobi off him but the normally immature man held him down, with a force strong enough to leave bruises, which it did. Tobi pulled away as something fell on the floor. He looked off the bed to see that it was Deidara's Icha Icha book. He gave an evil smirk which could be seen with his mask worn like that.  
"So, Deidara is a fan of the Icha Icha series? So I guess you won't mind if Tobi does this." He ran his tongue across Deidara's neck, Deidara not being able to hold back the moan.

"No, Tobi!! Please Stop it Un!!" Tobi continued, removing the blonde's shirt. (TOBI IS RUINING MY SASODEI FAN FICTION!!! DAMN YOU TOBI!!! WHERE IS SASORI!?!)

--

Sasori was in his room, watching the clock. He could barely wait till 5am. It was only 2 now. Wait, Sasori…You don't like waiting, or keeping people waiting…So what are you waiting for? Something in his mind told him to go to the brat and leave now. (GET GOING SASORI!!!) No, he would wait. It was the only way he would show he cared, by putting aside his hates and letting the blonde sleep. (WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU SASORI!?! NOW WHOS GOING TO SAVE DEIDEI!?!)

--

Deidara was now naked with Tobi over him.  
"Your Danna isn't going to come and save you." Deidara had tears running down his face.  
"Now, let's have some fun." Deidara was flipped over onto his back, still crying. Tobi lined himself up with the blonde's opening.

"Please….Tobi-San…I promise I will…give you…anything you want…just…please…don't…"

"Anything I want? Hmmm, I say, I want to fuck you." He slammed into the blonde, making him scream.

--

Sasori sighed. Only half an hour to go. (SASORI!! THE HELL YOU WAITING FOR!?!)

--

Tobi finally cummed into the sweaty blonde, who was sobbing and panting at the same time. It had been one of the worst experiences to the blonde in his entire life. He had been defiled. This was not how he had pictured his first time to be like. Tobi pulled himself out of him and flipped Deidara over.

"Look at you, so pitiful." He punched Deidara in the face, causing the blonde to cry more.  
"I was wrong, I don't want you. You're so weak. I don't even know why Sasori would want you. Your worthless." Tobi stood up, doing the top button of his pants back up. (O.O THIS THING IS SCARING ME!!! IM SCARRED FOR LIFE!!!)  
Tobi left the crying, naked blonde and walked out the room, not even bothering to close the door fully. He pulled his mask back over his full face and walked down the hallway, seeing Sasori also in the hallway walking towards the room he had just come from.

"Tobi? Did Pein say you could come into the base?"

"Tobi is Sorry!! Tobi just had some things he wanted to take care of. Tobi will leave now. Cause Tobi is a good boy (NOT A GOOD BOY!!!), bye bye Sasori-San!!"

Tobi ran off and Sasori just shrugged. Weirdo, probably couldn't even hurt a fly (IRONY!!).  
"Brat?" Sasori opened the partly open door, shocked to find the blonde naked and crying.  
"DEIDEI!!!!" He ran over to the snivelling blonde and wrapped his arms around the blonde, who buried his face into the puppets chest.

"Sasori Danna…I'm…Sorry…" Deidara blacked out.


	3. Whos Deidara?

Deidara woke up to find himself being carried (piggy back style ^O^) by a red haired man. He was still drowsy…Why had he been asleep again?  
"Where…are we going?"  
Sasori was relieved that Deidara was alright but he hid it well.

"Your finally awake, Brat? And I was having such a pleasant trip. Where do you think were going? To the festival."

"Brat? Who's Brat?" Sasori stopped.

"Are you okay Deidara?"

"Deidara? Is that my name? I can't remember…" Sasori gulped, what was wrong with the blonde? Was it just some sick and twisted joke? But after what the blonde had been through he would have to stay calm with Deidara.

"Do you remember who I am?"

"…Danna?" Sasori was filled with relief. So he remembered who he was.

"So you do remember."

"No…I don't…Something just told me to call you Danna. I have no idea who you are." (DUN DUN DAHHH!!! Shocking o.o)  
Sasori's eyes widened and he barely held back his tears.

"Can you walk?"

"I think, un….I think, un…Danna? For some reason I say un, un…Have I always done that?" Sasori bent down so Deidara could hop off. As soon as he did the puppet started walking again.

"As long as I've known you." Sasori barely managed to keep his voice right.

"Which is how long?"

"…3 years…"

"Wow, three whole years…How old am I?"

"19. And just call me Sa-" The blonde screamed. Sasori quickly turned to him.  
"What happened?" Deidara had a terrified look on his face.

"MY HANDS HAVE MOUTHES ON THEM!!!" (XD) Sasori stared at him.

"Yeah, you always have…" Hmmm…I know how to tell if he is faking… "Hey Deidara, what is your view on art?"

"Art? What is Art?" Sasori stared at him. There was no doubting it, even if he had been faking there was no way he would say something like that…

"Theres no doubting it…You have Amnesia…"

"…Amnesia?"

"…You have lost all your memories…Anyway, My name is Sasori, your name is Deidara. I am your Danna. I believe art is eternal, you say art is a bang…un. Your favorite food is Bakudan, your least favorite food is Pilaf, you are a Missing-Nin from Iwagakure, you're an Akatsuki member, and we are going to a festival for a few days." (…STALKER!!!)

"…Thank you Sasori. I might not know much but you seem to." Sasori stopped, making Deidara stop aswell.  
"Whats wrong, un?"

"Deidara…Do you remember what you said to me yesterday?"

"…No…Why? What did I say?" Sasori looked at him with a hurt look on his face. He didn't know what this emotion was. Fear? Anger? Pain?...Maybe this was what they called Love…

"You said you loved me." Deidara stared at him, a sort of terrified look on his face.

"WHAT!?! YOU LIAR!! I CANT LOVE YOU!! YOU'RE A GUY!! YOU'RE JOKING!! TELL ME YOU'RE JOKING!!!" Sasori now knew what this emotion was…Heart Break… (Poor Sasori T-T)

"Shut up, Brat. Your voice is annoying me." He was now angry and upset at the same time. He had planned to tell Deidara how he truly felt at the festival. Now it looked like he would have to scratch that plan.

--

Deidara looked at the red head. Why was he yelling at him? Did he actually tell him that he loved him? No, it couldn't be true…Was it? The only thing he knew was what he had been told by Sasori. He felt bad for the red head. He is missing Deidara, but unfortunately I'm not Deidara. I may look like him, talk like him, share his body, but I am not him. Poor guy. Deidara sighed and they continued on in silence.

--

Sasori wished Deidara would talk. If he had told the other Deidara to shut up he would have to put up with him saying he wouldn't in a million years. Who was this person? (Omj, this sounds a bit like Loveless manga o.o I have to say now that I thought of the amnesia idea before I realized it sounded a bit like it. I haven't read Loveless in ages)  
He sure as shit wasn't Deidara.

They finally reached the village, and the festival was there to greet them. Deidara looked at the twinkling lights.

"Danna…What would Deidara have done when you and him arrived?"

"Probably of grabbed my wrist and pulled me along to the nearest ride." Deidara nodded and calmly walked into the festival and straight to the cotton candy booth. Sasori looked down. Damn you kid, what have you done with my Deidara? More Heartbreak, Sasori hated this feeling more than pain, even though it felt like pain.

"I want my DeiDei back…And I will do whatever it takes to do so."  
Sasori smiled evilishly and walked into the festival grounds.


	4. Bruised Memories

Deidara was happily eating his cotton candy when Sasori walked up to him.  
"Wants some, un?"

"No, Brat. Im taking you on the Ferris Wheel."

"Still have some hope I will fall in love with you, do we?"

"Shut up and follow, or I will drag you by your hair."

"Have you always been such a downer, Sasori?" Deidara still followed, he didn't want his hair getting pulled out. He through the cotton candy stick in the bin after finishing. In a few minutes they were on the Ferris wheel.  
"Danna, am I scared of heights?"

"Hell know, in fact you always flew."

"I can fly?"

"You used your clay bird you made."

"…What's a clay bird?"

"…What am I going to do with you?" Sasori sighed as the wheel went slowly up, finally their one stopped at the top.  
Deidara was taking in all the sights just like the real Deidara would, Sasori was happy to see that there were still some traces of his DeiDei in this imposter. He was about to make his move he had planned from the very beginning of the trip. He leaned closer to an oblivious Deidara when suddenly the blonde turned to him.

"Danna?" Sasori stopped, he just couldn't kiss him when he was staring at him with those eyes, the eyes he loved, the ones he would never want to take advantage of. He leaned back a little.

"What is it, Brat?"

"What are these bruises on my arms?" Deidara held out his arm. Sasori looked at the bruises with disgust. Damn Tobi, you did this to my DeiDei, you hurt him and you made him forget me. IF I ever see you again I will kill you…

"Danna?" Sasori let go of his arm.

"You were attacked by a monster…" What he said was true, he considered Tobi a monster for what he had done. He didn't want to remind the blonde of the bad memory. That was the only good thing to come out of this situation, that he had forgotten.

"You expect me to believe that? It was probably you and you don't want me to know-"

"How dare you." Sasori had slapped Deidara. No, not Deidara…This imposter who had taken his place.  
"I would never take advantage over the one I loved."

"Of course, you'd never take advantage over me, but slapping me is on the okay list!!"

"I wasn't talking about you, you're not my Deidara." Sasori looked away, not letting the blonde see the tears in his eyes. Deidara looked at the red head. It wasn't his fault that he wasn't this Deidara that Sasori talked about. He looked back at the bruises on his arms. He ran his finger over the dark purple areas, as he did a dark image of someone looking down on him wearing an orange mask flashed through his head. He gasped. What had happened to him? He continued poking the bruises, trying to get the memory to re appear, but the only images he got were of the red head sitting next to him. He got irritated and slammed his fist into one of the bruises, a memory flashing through his head.

*flash back*

He was walking to some place, and the red head was walking next to him.  
Tell him, Deidara…Come on; tell him how you feel Deidara!!  
"Danna?" Sasori grunted as he hand a snout in his mouth.  
"I think I'm in love with you…" Sasori dropped his donut and stared at him.  
Good going Deidara, now he hates you. You should of waited to tell him, not out the blue like that. He walked into the dark, not wanting Sasori to see a tear running down his face (This is the first scene in chapter 1 from DeiDei's point of view)  
Deidara bumped into someone.  
"Ahh, Im s- … Oh, its just you Itachi. For a minute I though you were someone important, un." The black haired Uchiha stared at him through his Sharigan.

"And here I am with the idea that you would like a nice present."

"…Present?" Itachi held something out to him.

"It's a book." Deidara took the book and looked at the title.

"Make out paradise?"

"Its one of the Icha Icha novels, pretty popular in my old village. I heard what you said to Sasori just then. This one has some Yaoi in it. In case your so innocent you don't know what to do in this fan fiction." (XD!! Well, so far I would say he didn't even read the book, seeing as everything is going wrong in this story!!)

"Ahhh…Thank you…I think…" Itachi just nodded and walked off. Deidara blinked after him. He then walked off to his room with the book.

*End of Flashback ^-^*

"Are you okay?" Sasori was standing over him.

"…What happened?"

"We're at the hotel room, you blacked out of the Ferris wheel. I can't take you anywhere, can I?"

"Shut up, Brat."

"…What did you just call me?"

"Sexy Brat." Deidara suddenly put his arm around Sasori's neck and bought him into a kiss. (FINALLY!! *dances*) Sasori was shocked for a few seconds but was to overjoyed that Deidara had come back.

"Deidara? Is that you?"

"…No…But I know that it is true that I loved you before I forgot everything. I now know I did love you, if I have once, then maybe I can learn to again." He was rewarded with only a slap. Sasori stood up and walked to the door.

"You are still not Deidara; I loved him for who he was. As far as I am sure, you are someone completely different. I will only be with the true Deidara." With that he closed the door behind him. (*face-palms self*) Deidara stared at the door, a tear running down his cheek.

"Why can't you love me?"


	5. Dreamed Freedom

Sasori sat down looking at a note that had been left for him by Woolfy in the hotel room.

'Dear Sassy,

Hope you and Blondie have fun. I'm sure you will find a way to bring back his memories. Hope to see you soon.

P.S. Don't be shocked if that puppet of you dies, there were some glitches with it and now it not working at full capacity or some random science talk like that. I don't know I'm too lazy.

Bye Bye, send Blondie my regards, as soon as you tell him who I am. Later Sassy!!

-Woolfy.'

Sasori read it over several times. She had known what happened to Deidara? Well, she had said "I know everything" (chapter one ^-^). And what was all that about his puppet double? Oh well, it probably wasn't anything to worry about. He sighed and folded the note back up.  
"I guess I should get back to Deidara…I mean the Imposter."  
He scowled as he got up and started back to the hotel.

--

Deidara had fallen asleep and was in the middle of a dream. He was running to someone who stood on a cliff. They turned around and smiled at him with love. There was a sunset behind them and they looked so irresistible in with the light shining in their blood red coloured hair. He ran faster towards his Danna, arms out stretched. Suddenly the path underneath his feet turns to black and the beautiful scene before him disappears. He is filled with terror as the orange masked face stares down at him.  
He woke up to the sound of the door opening.  
"TOBI!!!"  
Sasori steps into the room.

"What was that Deidara?" There were tears running down the blondes face.

"Tobi…." It was a whisper but the red head heard it, shocked.

"Deidara…You remember?"

"…tobi…" It was an even smaller whisper and Sasori barely heard it.

"STOP SAYING TOBI!! WHAT ELSE DO YOU REMEMBER!?!" Deidara burst out crying and Sasori was standing next to him in an instant. He wrapped his arms around the blonde, who in turn wrapped his arms around the puppets neck. Sasori started crying.  
"I'm so sorry DeiDei…Its not fault…If you hadn't loved me you would not of forgotten…If you hadn't loved me we would both me in doing our mission now instead of you having these memories (Then thank Jashin he is in love)." The blonde screamed and pushed him away.

"DANNA!! YOUR ARM!!!" Sasori quickly looked at his bare arms, he could see nothing wrong with them.

"What about my arms?"

"THERE MADE OF WOOD!!!" Sasori stared at him.

"I knew it was too good to be true, If your not you, why did you remember Tobi?"

"I don't know…It's just something in my mind that burst out…But Danna, what about your arms?"

"IM A PUPPET!! IF YOU WERE THE REAL DEIDARA YOU WOULD KNOW THAT!!" He took a deep breath, trying to calm down. He finally did and with a sigh walked over to his side of the fairly large bed. (WOOT!! They has to share a double bed!!) He climbed into his side of the bed and lay facing away from the blonde. Deidara blinked and scooted over to Sasori's side of the bed.

"I'm Sorry I'm not your boyfriend." He nuzzled his face into the back of Sasori's shoulder. Sasori didn't care. Somewhere inside this stranger was the one he loved.

--

Deidara was back in the same dream as before. He looked at the figure of Sasori on the cliff…He knew that if he could just reach him it would all be normal. The figure of Tobi stood before him once more. If only he could remember a jutsu he could use. No, he wouldn't give up this chance, it may be the last time he dreamed this dream. He ran at Tobi.

"You are worthless." The voice of Tobi echoes through his dreams. He didn't faulter. He continued running. He ran straight through the memory of Tobi and right into the loving arms of his Danna. (Such a cute dream ^O^)

--

Deidara awoke. He sat up. The blonde looked around the unfamiliar hotel room. He looked at the still sleeping figure of Sasori next to him. He gave an evil smile and leant down. He whispered into the puppets ear with the most seductive voice he could muster.

"Sasori Danna, un…My art is better than yours."


	6. Double Dare

"Not now Deidara, I'm sleeping…" Deidara frowned, then with all his strength managed to push his Danna off the bed. Sasori glared at Deidara.  
"I WAS SLEEPING BRAT!!"

"I know, un. I'm just evil like that (o.o EVIL!!). I wanted to remind you that art is a bang, un. Not eternal." He smiled evily.

"…Deidara? Is that you?"

"Did you hit your head, Danna? Who else would I be!?"

"Then I will ask a question only Deidara would know. Who was your first kiss?"

"…You were…"

"You need to be more specific."

"You were my first kiss when we were playing 'Truth, Dare or Double Dare.' with Itachi and Kisame. We had to do Double Dare. We got back at them afterward though, un!!"  
He remembered the Dare his Danna had said. They had had to ask Kakuzu for $5, which had not been a pretty scene (XD I CAN IMAGINE!!). Sasori stared gaping at him.

"W-What's the last thing you remember?"

"I remember I was in my room reading an Icha Icha book that Itachi had given me when Tobi was at the door and- OH GOD!! DANNA!!!" Deidara burst out crying and flung himself off the bed and onto his Danna, burying his face into the puppet's chest. Sasori stroked the blonde's hair, trying to comfort him.  
"IM SORRY, DANNA!! IT WASN'T MY FAULT!! IT WAS TOBI'S!! I TOLD HIM TO STOP!! IM SORRY DANNA!! PLEASE FORGIVE ME, UN!!!"

"Why are you asking for my forgiveness?! I've been more worried about you actually getting raped!!" Deidara was still crying.  
"Do you remember anything else?"

"I *sniffle* remember you running in, un…You called me DeiDei…Then…Nothing…" Sasori nodded at this.  
"Danna…Please…I want you…Fuck me…Make me forget about *sniffle* Tobi…Just have your way with me…"

"No, I won't. I don't want you to go through the same thing again, even if you ask me to and say its okay…"

"I'm not asking you, Sasori. I'm telling you. I trust you and I know you will try your best to not hurt me. And if I tell you to stop, I know you will."

"…DeiDei…"

"Just do it, Danna." Sasori wrapped his arms tighter around the blonde and picked him up. The puppet gently placed him on the sheet less bed (all the sheets came off when Deidara pushed Sasori off XD). The puppet climbed onto the bed and kneeled over the blonde.

"I love you Deidara. I hope you realized that a long time ago. And if you didn't, then you know now. I've loved you since I first saw you." Deidara just nodded, his eyes were still a little puffy from crying before.  
"Alright then." Sasori leaned down and passionately kissed the blonde, after a few seconds he nibbled on Deidara's lower lip, begging for entrance. Deidara gladly opened his mouth to the puppets tongue, barely holding back the moans as the puppets tongue explored his mouth which still tasted of cotton candy. Wait…Why does my mouth taste like cotton candy? Deidara didn't care; he just focused on the kiss. After a minute they had to part for air and also top give Sasori a chance to take Deidara's top off. He started kissing Deidara tenderly on his neck, hitting certain pleasure spots that made the blonde moan with pleasure. As his lips were busily keeping Deidara distracted, his hand un-buttoned the blonde's pants (…*eye twitch*). Sasori stopped kissing Deidara's neck and moved his lips to one of the blonde's ears.  
"Can you help me to remove my top?" Deidara shuddered; God his Danna's voice was hot. He pulled off Sasori's top easily and stared lustfully at his Danna's hot puppet body.

Sasori gave his normal smirking smile at the look on Deidara's face. It was a look of absolute lust. In one swift motion he had pulled the blondes pants off and threw them onto the floor along with Deidara's boxers. He licked a hot trail down Deidara's chest as he neared the blondes erect cock. Deidara moaned at every movement of the red heads tongue.

Sasori finally reached the blonde's manhood, running his tongue up the length. Deidara moaned the loudest moan so far that night. Sasori smirked and wrapped his mouth around the cock, sucking intensely. Deidara was being driven crazy by Sasori's mouth.  
"Oh *pant* God your mouth." It wasn't long after that that Deidara finally released, filling up Sasori's mouth. Sasori swallowed the creamy substance and held three fingers to the blonde's mouth.

"Suck." Deidara took the digits in his mouth and coated them with saliva. With his other hand, Sasori removed his own pants. As soon as he felt that they were lubricated (WooT!! I is smart, I dunt even used a Dictionary!!) enough, he removed them from the blondes mouth. He kissed Deidara once more, dribbling his tongue through all the crevasses hidden in the younger man's mouth. While the blonde was distracted, he inserted one finger into the blonde's heat. Deidara bit Sasori on the tongue accidentally, making the red head stop kissing him.  
"Are you okay? Does it hurt? I can stop if you want me to."

"No, its okay, I'm just a little bit tender in that area since…anyway, please Danna, continue. It doesn't hurt too much." Deidara lied about the last part, even one finger hurt like hell, but he would find some way to enjoy it.

"Then I will continue. Stop me anytime." Sasori returned to kissing him, inserting the other two fingers. Deidara clenched his fists tightly (Still no bed sheets XD), but managed to not bite his Danna once more. Sasori moved the fingers in and out and finally removed them. He placed Deidara's legs on his shoulders and lined himself up.  
"I just hope I don't hurt you too much."

"Stop worrying and *pant* get inside me…" (...OMFG!!! *faints* . K-0!!) Sasori nodded and slowly enter the blonde as to not hurt him to much. Deidara's hands grabbed the back of Sasori's legs and pulled him in faster.  
"Don't treat me like a kid; you don't need to go that gentle!!"

"If you say so." He pulled mostly out, and then suddenly slammed back into Deidara, making them both moan. (*regains consciousness* ?? What happened? *reads what I wrote* O.O *faints once more*) Sasori kissed Deidara passionately once more, continuing to slam into him. After a bit, he finally hit the bundle of nerves that made Deidara scream out.

"OH FUCK!! SASORI DANNA!!!" Sasori smirked and hit him again and again at the same angle. Deidara moaned even louder. This experience was much better than his previous experience (The author could not write a funny thing to do with this as she is still passed out). After a few minutes they both released, panting heavily. Sasori fiercely kissed Deidara once more. He rolled off the blonde and lay next to him. After they had caught their breath, the blonde snuggled up with his Danna.  
"I love you Danna. You're my Sexy Puppet." (Random- …I think the author is dead…)

"I love you so much Deidara. I won't let anybody else have you. I will be by your side to protect you, no matter what." Sasori opened up his chest compartment and rummaged around inside a little before pulling something out.  
"DeiDei…Will you marry me?"

(Good news!! I'm not dead ^o^!! *reads the last line* … .)


	7. A Little Present

"WHAT!?!" Deidara sat up (When are they gonna realize they dun have sheets!?!) and stared at Sasori.

"I'm sorry, forget I ever sa-"

"No Danna."

"…Ok-"

"I MEANT NO TO I WON'T FORGET!! MY ANSWER IS YES!! YES ONE MILLION TIMES!! YES!! I DO!! I WILL!! OH GOD THIS IS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!! TELL ME IM NOT DREAMING!!!" Suddenly Sasori was pinning down Deidara once more.

"You're not dreaming." He leant down and kissed the blonde tenderly.  
"So I will take that as a 'Yes'?"

"Dah, Danna!! It's like my dream come true!!" Sasori smiled at this and leaned over the side of the bed to retrieve the covers (FINALLY NOTICED!!!).

"I'm sorry it was so out the blue there, I had planned to ask at the top of the Ferris wheel, where it was more romantic. But for the past day (Isn't that weird? It was only one day that he had amnesia o.o), you had lost all your memories. You weren't you. I refused to propose to anyone other than the true you, even if they looked exactly like you, they weren't my DeiDei." He ran his fingers lovingly through Deidara's hair.

"I lost my memories? But how can that be, un?"

"I prefer not to go into specifics but I would blame either becoming traumatized, a jutsu, or an all powerful being controlling everything that happens in our lives, like an Author or something." (XD!!! ME!!!)

"That last idea is just crazy." (CRAZY YET TRUE!!!)

"Yeah, something just told me to say it." (YEAH!! I DID!!! Okay, anyway, enough comic relief…Even though comic relief is aweasome!!!)  
"Anyway, you scared me so much. I thought I had lost the real you. The you who I love."

"Did I remember anything? Tell me I remembered you at least, un!! I don't know how I would live without knowing who you were!!"

"We should get some sleep, we have had a big day (and night =3)."

"One that I can't even remember, un." Sasori took Deidara's hand and slipped something onto his finger. Deidara stared at the glittering sapphire ring with a shocked look on his face and tears in his eyes.  
"OH MY GOSH DANNA!!! IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL, UN!!! I LOVE IT!!!" Deidara flung his arms around Sasori's neck. Sasori smiled and hugged the blonde back. With that they both fell asleep. (So Kawaii ^O^ *dances*)

--The Next Morning

Deidara was the first to wake up out of the couple. He sat up and yawned, making the puppet wake up as well. Deidara was pushed off the bed.

"What was that for Danna!?"

"Pay back for when you did it to me earlier." He smiled and helped Deidara up.

"I need a shower, un." Sasori kissed the blonde on the cheek.

"The bathroom is just there." He pointed to a white door in the room.

"Thanks Danna." He picked up his clothes and walked into the bathroom, closing the door after him but not locking it in case his Danna decided to join him. Sasori started putting his own clothes on, as soon as he atleast had his pants back on there was a scratching at the door of the hotel room. Sasori quickly pull his shirt over his puppet body and answered it.

"?? There's no one there. Probably just my imagination." He closed the door, not seeing the little shadow dart in. He tidied up his clothes and lay down on the messy bed. He jumped when a voice sounded next to his ear.

"Sasori, I presume." Sasori sat up and looked at where the voice came from. There on the bed was a small lizard, no, it was a small dragon. He remembered the little dragon called Lizard from when he was partnered with Woolfy.

"You presume correctly little dragon. Do you have a message from Woolfy?"

"Yes. My Mistress sends this message." It flickered its tongue before continuing.  
"She has successfully captured the Shukaku with only the casualties of losing an arm. The Sealing has already begun and is going well. The ninjas Sakura Haruno, Kakashi Hatake, Might Gai, Neji Hyuga, Rock Lee, Tenten (she doesn't have a last name O.O), Chiyo Mihama and the Kyuubi are in following but will not make it time. The puppet double of you is still suffering some glitches here and there, my Mistress was too lazy to repair them. She also says she cannot wait for the wedding though she will not be able to make it. She also gives you this as a sort of wedding present." Lizard pulled its tail forward, revealing a small container, containing a few pills. Sasori took them and read the label.

"MPREG Pills?" (OMFG!!!! *faints*) Sasori looked back at the small dragon.

"My Mistress is a bit of an odd one, I will admit. With my errand completed I am to return. Good bye Sasori of the Red Sands, I shall be back soon with more information." The dragon disappeared in a small puff of smoke. Sasori returned his gaze to the container. How will Deidara react? He slipped the container into his pocket.  
"I will ask him later."

--*After Deidara finished his shower*

Deidara came out of the room, hair still a bit damp.  
"Danna, can we get some breakfast, un?"  
Sasori was sitting on the bed, reading a book. He looked up and closed it, realizing how hungry he was.

"Yeah, course, I'm starving as well." He place the book upside down on the side table so the blonde couldn't read the title (Suspicious!!) and stood up.

"Danna?"

"Yes DeiDei?"

"Can it just be a small wedding?" Sasori was a little shocked, usually the blonde would want something big, a bang.

"We can do whatever you want." He kissed Deidara on the lips. They went out the hotel room to get breakfast.


	8. I Agree

-- The Next day

Sasori and Deidara stood before a priestess. They had decided just to keep the wedding between them, though in the message that Sasori had received from Woolfy, it appeared she already knew they were getting married. The Priestess had shortish brown hair and wore a black and red kimono.

"Hello, I am Cherry. I will be your priestess for this joyous day." Neither Sasori or Deidara had gotten dressed up, each just in casual clothes. They hadn't wanted to cause a big fuss over today.  
"We are gathered here today to join this man and wife (she doesn't know DeiDei is a guy XD), in holy matrimony. Sasori. Do you take Deidara as your lawfully wedded wife (XD), to have and to hold, in sickness and health, till death do you part?"

"I do."

"And Deidara, do you take Sasori as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and health, till death do you part?"

"Oh, God Yes, un!!

"Then by the power invested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife (Lolz, I laugh every time Cherry says wife XD). You may now kiss the bride." Sasori caressed Deidara's cheek and kissed him tenderly on the lips.

-That night (Oh Jashin, NOT ANOTHER SMUT ONE!! I suck at smut =.=")

Deidara and Sasori walked into their hotel room. It had been a busy day for the both of them. Deidara sat on the bed.

"Wow, today was killer!! I still can't believe we went on the roller coaster 6 times in a row!! I'm exhausted, un!!" He was pushed back on the bed as his Danna climbed on top of him.

"I hope you're not too exhausted. We aren't officially married till _______ (I forgot the word ^-^" But it that thing that they not officially married till they haves their honey moon thing ^o^" It was in Romeo and Juliet!!)." He started licking the blondes neck, causing Deidara to moan.  
"DeiDei, theres just one thing I need to ask you."

"What is it, un?"

"How would you feel about having my child?" (…As the Author, I have no comment…) Deidara stared at Sasori, wide eyed.

"WHAT!? IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE!?!" Sasori caressed Deidara's cheek while his other hand took the little bottle of pills out his pocket. He held them plastic bottle up infront of their faces.

"A was a wedding present from Woolfy. MPREG pills."

"Where the hell would she get a thing like that, un?"

"You're asking the wrong puppet, I have no idea about most things she gets up to." (Like writing this fan fic XD WOOT WOOT!!!)  
"Back to the question. Do you want to have my child?" (…Everytime he says that line, somewhere in the world a TobiDei fangirl is converted to SasoDei fangirlism ^o^) Deidara crushed his lips to his Danna's in a kiss.

"Yes, Danna, I do." (…100 TobiDei fangirls becoming converted with that line ^o^ Statistics are hell sweet!!)  
"Just one question….What was that book you were reading earlier?" Sasori sat up and took the book off the side table. He showed Deidara the cover, which read 'Parenting: So your going to be a Daddy?'. Deidara nodded and Sasori replaced the book back on the table. He unscrewed the lid of the pills and pulled on of the little pink pills out.

"Say, ah."

"Uuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnn…." Deidara held his mouth open while Sasori placed the pill on his tongue. Deidara easily swallowed the small pill while Sasori re did the lid of the container and placed it on top of the book.

"How do you feel?"

"Fine, there is an odd sensation in my stomach but other that, fine." Sasori began removing the blonde's and his own clothes. He took in Deidara's man hood and started sucking, driving the blonde into ecstasy. After a few minutes Deidara couldn't hold on and released into the puppets mouth. Sasori swallowed the liquid and started kissing the blonde passionately. After kissing him, he bought three fingers to Deidara's mouth.

"Suck." Deidara took in the puppets digits and coated them evenly with saliva. When the puppet felt they were coated enough he pulled them out the younger one's mouth. He inserted one finger into his DeiDei's heat. Deidara let out a moan and clung onto the bed sheets as the puppet inserted the other 2 digits. Sasori moved his fingers in and out, making his sweetheart moan some more. Sasori pulled his fingers out of DeiDei and lined himself up.  
"You ready?" The blonde nodded and was answered by Sasori thrusting into his heat. Deidara let out a large moan.  
"Heh, looks like I found the spot already." (Victory to Sasori!!! =D)  
Sasori kept slamming into the sensitive spot, causing the blonde to scream out his name.

"OH GOD DANNA!!!" Deidara's stomach hurt a little but the puppet's movements were so pleasurable that the pain was barely there.

After a few minutes, neither of them could hold on anymore and they both released, Sasori into the blonde and Deidara over the puppet's chest. Sasori pulled out and rolled off of Deidara. Both were heavily panting but Sasori managed to pull the covers over the both of them. They snuggled up with each other and fell into a calm sleep.

-

"What is the message you wish me to send, Mistress?"

"Tell Sasori that the puppet double was destroyed. I shall stay as Deidara for a bit, probably fake my death in a bit before the Akatsuki realize I'm not the real Deidara, though Itachi and Tobi can see through my jutsu, but neither of them seem to care. Tell Sasori and Deidara that I wish them luck as parents. That is all Lizard. Thank you."  
Woolfy smiled at the small dragon which flickered it's tongue.

"As you wish, Woolfy Mistress." Lizard disappeared into the shadows to give the puppet the message.  
Woolfy straightened up and performed the transformation jutsu so she looked like Deidara.  
"Now, where did my arms go, un?" She started looking around for her arm, running into Tobi and Zetsu.


	9. Parenting

-- Four Years Later

"DeiDei, I'm home!!" Sasori walked into his and the blondes house (They gots a house now ^O^). A small figure came running out the kitchen to greet him.

"DADDY'S HOME!!!" The little 3 year old girl was picked up and swung around by her father. They both laughed and Sasori hugged his daughter.

"Hello Aiwa. How's my little princess?" (Her name, Aiwa, is translated to 'Love Peace')

"Hungry!! Mummy is making Dinner!!" Sasori ruffled the girls short blonde hair and took her hand to walk to the kitchen. They walked into the kitchen to find Deidara stirring something over the stove. The blonde looked at him as he entered the room and smiled.

"Hi Hunny, we're having Mai Fun for dinner tonight."

"Sounds delicious." Sasori wrapped one arm around the blonde's neck and kissed him tenderly on the lips. His other hand ran down Deidara's body and stopped on the blonde's large stomach (DeiDei is pregnant again XD).  
"But not as delicious as you." He started kissing the blondes neck. Deidara laughed and managed to push the puppet away.

"Not in front of Aiwa, un." Sasori gave a chuckle. He picked his daughter up and placed her on his shoulders. Sasori loved being a dad, just like he loved his DeiDei.  
"Tomorrow morning we can go to the festival. Did I tell you that it was at the festival your dad proposed, un?" Deidara and Sasori had agreed never to tell their daughter about what happened with Tobi and that Deidara had gotten amnesia. They had just gone on with Sasori's first plan, saying that he had proposed at the top of the Ferris wheel, which he would have anyway.

"Yes, un!! I love that story!!" (Aiwa says un as well =3 So cwute!!)

-After Dinner

Sasori was carrying Aiwa up the stairs to her bedroom, Deidara next to him.

"She's such an angel, un."

"Thanks to you." He kissed DeiDei on the cheek and opened the pink door. Inside the had white walls with pink and purple flowers on. The carpet was purple and the bed was pink. There was a few little puppets hanging around the room that Sasori had carved himself (out of Wood ^-^ Not people) and some clay figurines (Non exploding ones of course ^-^ what kind of father/mother would DeiDei be if he gave his daughter dynamite to play with?). Deidara pulled the pink covered back and Sasori placed their daughter lightly on her bed. They both tucked her in and kissed her good night. Deidara turned on her nightlight and they both went out the room quietly, closing the door behind them. Sasori kissed the blonde once more.  
"So what did the doctor say?"

"TWINS!!" Sasori stared at him for a few seconds. Sasori wrapped his arms around the blonde and chuckled.

"I love you so much, DeiDei." Sasori picked up Deidara bridal style.

"I know, I love you too, un." Sasori carried Deidara to their shared bedroom, closing the door behind them.

The End!!

*…OMJ THAT WAS SO KAWAII!!!! I LOVED WRITING THIS!! This is a short chapter but it is my favorite ^o^ Also the last one!! Which is a relief for me cause I gots a tonnes of Homework, and by homework I mean drawing with my graphics tablet ^O^  
Thanks to all the people who inspired me to write a SasoDei Fan fic thingy ^-^ Please comment and/or fave!! Hope you liked reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!!

-Woolfy*


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